


He Knows He's Going to Regret This

by Perry_Downing



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Bachelor Party, Ben would rather be home with Rey, F/M, I Never, Rey knows her man, Space Cupcake
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-02-25
Packaged: 2018-09-26 18:05:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9914618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Perry_Downing/pseuds/Perry_Downing
Summary: Set in the 'He Knows' universe, three years after the events of 'He Knows He Needs to Stop'. Poe and Finn drag Ben out for his bachelor party. Ben is about as enthusiastic as you'd expect.---"No way, uh uh," Ben says as he takes in all the bare skin undulating around him."Come on! It's your last night as a free man! Don't tell me Rey cares about you just looking," Poe says with rolled eyes.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Space Cupcake returns!

"No way, uh uh," Ben says as he takes in all the bare skin undulating around him. 

"Come on! It's your last night as a free man! Don't tell me Rey cares about you just  _ looking _ ," Poe says with rolled eyes.

He thinks of how Snoke had tortured her with images of the other women from his long-dead past and he blanches. It had taken a long time for her to truly believe that she’s all he’s ever wanted after his old master had trapped her in his mind, forcing her to watch as a projection of Kylo Ren rutted with other women. He sometimes wishes he could kill Snoke again for doing that to her. He’d only  _ just  _ managed to get her to believe in his devotion when she’d been subjected to that sadistic display. That experience had haunted his darling girl for  _ months _ .

She'd told him before he left that he should enjoy himself, but he really doesn't  _ want  _ to look at anyone but her. Poe might joke that he's losing his freedom, but he knows that without Rey he would still be trapped. Rey  _ is  _ freedom. Without her ... well tonight isn't the night to think about that. 

Yes, the women here are beautiful, but none are his Rey, his incomparable light. He doesn't want anyone but her. He never really has. But Finn's eyes are nearly falling from his head as he takes in the spectacle and Ben realizes this isn't really about him. He hopes this won’t rekindle her insecurity. It hasn’t come up in well over a year now, but … well he just doesn’t want to hurt her.

"Fine," Ben says grudgingly. "But you better not try to get me to  _ touch  _ them."

"Are you kidding? Rey would Force push my bits into the next system," Poe says through his constant grin. 

They make their way through the crowd and find a table near the back. A Togruta woman dances slowly, removing more and more of her sheer clothing and two humans writhe against each other, mimicking  _ very  _ private activities. Everywhere his gaze falls there are women dancing provocatively and he's not quite sure where to look. 

\---

"I've never joined the hyperspace club," Poe offers drunkenly when it’s his turn. He very pointedly slams back his drink and Ben sighs, taking his shot. 

Finn blinks blearily. "What's the hyperspace club?"

"Seriously?" Poe asks in disbelief. 

"What? I was a stormtrooper," Finn shrugs defensively.

"It's when you are ... intimate ... at light speed," Ben explains delicately, pink spots appearing on his cheeks. He has very fond memories of how he and Rey had experimented with turning off the gravity on the Falcon but he won’t be sharing  _ that _ , no matter the rules of this silly game of ‘I Never’. 

"Well, I don't know about you, Solo, but I’m not one for  _ light speed _ ." Poe winks. 

Ben rolls his eyes. 

"I've never been in love," Finn says when it’s his turn. 

Ben gulps down the fiery liquor and Poe refills his glass. "You gotta do another shot on that one, buddy."

"What, why?" Ben asks. He thought the rules were rather straightforward and he doesn’t remember anything about additional drinks.

"Because  _ you  _ are at least twice as in love as any man I've ever seen." Poe nudges the drink towards Ben and Ben glares at it.

It's then that Ben notices Finn's still full glass. "No cheating, trooper," Ben growls,  _ not  _ liking the reminder of Finn's feelings for his soon-to-be-wife. 

Finn shrugs. "I'm not."

"Really. I was there remember, in her head. I  _ saw  _ the night you kissed her." The sick feeling of jealousy floods him and he tries to push away the memories of how  _ Finn  _ had been the first man to kiss Rey while he had watched helplessly through the Bond. He’d almost given himself away after painstakingly hiding their connection for nearly a year. His half-mad raging and furious tears would  _ not  _ have been a good way for her to realize he’d been lurking in her mind since  _ Starkiller _ . 

"I cared about her, still do. Don't worry Solo! Not like that," Finn rushes to say in response to the growl coming from the imposing man. Ben may have shed Kylo Ren four years ago, but he's still intense and powerful. 

"But I was never in love with her. Maybe, if she'd felt the same way ... but no, it was never love." The former stormtrooper smiles sadly. 

The other men stare at Finn and he grins. "Better get drinking!"

Poe recovers first and ruefully takes his shot while Ben gulps down the additional drink. It’s not as if Poe’s wrong. He probably  _ does  _ love Rey far more completely than how other men love. 

Ben has always assumed that Finn has been in love with Rey this whole time. He's struggled for  _ years  _ to keep his jealousy over Rey's friendship with Finn under control. He feels something shift inside and there's a loosening in his chest. 

Now it’s Ben’s turn and he contemplates his companions. He realizes he doesn’t know nearly as much about them as he should. Rey pushes him to get to know them better and he always side-steps the conversations. 

He looks down at his glass and says softly, “I’ve never had a best friend.”

Poe and Finn share a glance and dutifully drink their shots. Everyone grows quiet. 

“You know, Solo … it doesn’t have to be like that.” Poe lays a gentle hand on Ben’s shoulder. 

Ben looks away but doesn’t shrug off the other man’s gesture. “Yes … it does.” He’ll trust Rey because somehow she makes it possible for him to look at himself in the mirror, but he doesn’t expect or deserve anyone else to forgive him his sins. Certainly not the men in front of him.

Finn and Poe again make eye contact. The energy in the group has gone from good-natured ribbing to bleak and Ben wonders at his special talent for ruining things.

Suddenly Finn blurts out, “I’ve never been with a woman!”

Poe’s head swivels quickly to Finn. “What about that looker on Cathne, or that amazing blonde from the pick-up on Preslan?”

“Nothing happened. We just talked.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, all this time? Buddy, why didn’t you say anything? We gotta take care of this. Tonight!” Poe leaps to his feet.

“Hey, you both have to take your shots!” Finn points out.

“Yeah, sure,” Poe says as he drinks it fast and almost throws the glass down in his haste to leave the table. Before Ben really gets what the hell is going on, Poe is off talking to a tall, graceful Twi’lek, pointing back to their table.

“You, too, Solo. Honestly, for the racket you two make, you should have to drink the bottle.”

Ben blushes. It’s not his fault Rey gets so marvelously loud. Well, perhaps it  _ is  _ his fault, he thinks smugly.   

Finn looks at Ben for a long moment before saying, “I know I don’t have to warn you to take good care of her, I know you’d die before you’d hurt her on purpose.”

“Yes,” he responds simply.

“But … I’ve wanted to say this for a long time. You have to let some other people in. She’s your whole world and that’s a pretty big burden for one lonely girl from Jakku.”

“I don’t need anyone but Rey.”

“No, you probably don’t. But Rey needs you to have other people to lean on. You need … you need to make friends. Real friends.”

“Volunteering?” Ben sneers, keeping his eyes down.

“Hey, I’m here tonight aren’t I? I think that speaks for itself.”

Ben’s head snaps up and he looks at Finn. Really looks at him. He senses only sincerity and he doesn’t know what to do with such openness. He begins to fidget with his glass when Poe returns with the Twi’lek.

“Well boys, this is Shalla. Shalla, this is my friend Finn.” Poe encourages her to sit next to the former stormtrooper and she gracefully slides in next to him.

Finn blinks, his eyes drawn to her impressive cleavage before he remembers himself and looks up into her face. “H-hello.”

“Hello, Finn. Poe was telling me what a brave pilot you are, how you defected from the First Order and now help maintain peace.” She puts her hand on his thigh and leans in. “Let me show you my gratitude.”

Finn seems both nervous and eager so Ben says nothing. But something about this just doesn’t sit well with him. Perhaps it’s his own history with hired women, but he finds he doesn’t want that strange, empty feeling for Finn. Where the body is sated but the soul is starving. It doesn’t matter, it’s none of his business.

He watches as Shalla weaves her magic. She’s very good at her job. Soon Finn looks nearly drugged as she trails her fingers along his arm. Poe is chatting good naturedly with one of the dancers and Ben just sips his drink, lost in thought.

Ben’s first time had been confusing …  _ wrong  _ … something he tries to forget. Frankly, he tries to never think about any of the women Snoke would  _ reward  _ him with. He senses through the Force that the Twi’lek genuinely likes Finn and Ben hopes he won’t feel like scrubing himself raw afterwards. Not like Ben had. 

Then she’s pulling Finn up by the hand, clearly intent on leading him to the more private areas of the club and Ben catches Finn’s eyes. They aren’t excited, they’re afraid. He knows he shouldn’t, but he skims the surface of Finn’s thoughts and finds … doubt. Ben frowns, trying to decide what to do. Just as Finn and his new companion are about to disappear into the crowd, Ben vaults from the table and rushes after them.

He stops Finn with his hand and the other man turns and looks at him with his head tilted.

“Don’t,” Ben murmurs. 

“Don’t what?” Finn asks steadily while Shalla looks on, a questioning look on her face.

“Look … just …” Ben huffs out a frustrated breath then pulls Finn with him to a corner so they won’t be overheard.

“You don’t want to do this. Wait. Wait for someone who matters.”

Finn looks at his shoes. “Yeah, I wanted to, but I’ve never met anyone else who … not like with …”

“With Rey,” Ben finishes for him. He expects the familiar jealousy to take hold but this time there’s only compassion.

“Yeah. I’m tired of feeling like some boy in a man’s world.”

“It won’t change anything. I … look, please trust me. Wait. You’ll regret it if you don’t.”

“You sound like you’re speaking from experience.”

“I am.” One of the many experiences Rey wipes away with her blinding love and forgiving light.

“Oh.” Finn looks over at the beautiful Twi’lek then back to Ben.

“Just … not like this. You’re right, it doesn’t have to mean anything. Maybe you’re like Poe, who seems to take it all in stride, enjoy what comes his way. But I think … I think you’re more like me. It … it wasn’t good for me,” Ben admits quietly.

Finn holds his eyes for a long time then nods. He doesn’t say anything as he returns to Shalla and Ben watches as he takes her hand. His heart sinks. But then Finn is leading her to the dance floor instead of to the back rooms. 

“Hey, why’d you stop him?” Poe says, startling Ben.

“I … I sensed this wasn’t right for him.”

“Did the Force tell you that?”

“More my own experience. He would regret it.”

Poe furrows his brow. “What’s to regret, look at her!” he says, pointing to the now-dancing couple.

Ben shakes his head. “You drank when Finn said he’d never been in love. Surely you know how different it is when you care about someone?”

“Well, yeah, but it’s fun no matter what.”

Ben raises a brow. “That is not how it is for everyone, Dameron.”

“Huh. Well, I guess it’s only credits. Come on, let’s see if I can beat you at sabacc. No Force!”

Ben holds up his hands. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

\---

He very quietly enters their home, not wanting to wake Rey. He’s still a bit drunk and isn’t very steady on his feet. As he pads into their entryway he sees a dim light coming from the sitting room. Rey must have left it on for him. He enters the room, intending to turn it off when he stops dead in his tracks.

Rey is sitting on a chair wearing nothing but an old First Order officer’s cap and impossibly high heels. He just blinks at her, unable to form words. There’s something about the trappings of his old life contrasted with her gorgeous form that _ does something to him _ .

Gracefully, she stands and goes to the wall of consoles and soon music fills the room. She starts to dance, dance like the girls in the club.  But unlike the dancers, she’s beautifully bare to him and he swallows. Even after years with her, she still steals his breath and completely owns his body.

She still hasn’t said anything, and now she’s swaying towards him. She places her hands on his chest and utters in a sinfully sultry voice, “I know you were good. And now you get your reward …”

Married life is going to be perfect.

**Author's Note:**

> One year ago today I began posting my very first piece of fan-fiction, 'He Knows He Needs to Stop'. What followed was absolutely life-changing. Everyone has been so incredibly kind and supportive. I am blessed, utterly blessed that people choose to give my stories their time. Grateful does not begin to cover how I feel.
> 
> Thank you.
> 
> Thank you, ArtemisBare, for the title and the super speedy beta!


End file.
